I asked for a second chance and got it. I think I picked the right one this time. I am just surprised that I was given this chance. I really broke this guy's heart.
So far so good, though. We are having a great time and everything is really relaxed. It feel so comfortbale, but sometimes I think it feels too comfortable. Is it supposed to be like this already? Here I go again, over-analyzing everything. I always do this when I am in a relationship. I can't just let things go the way they are supposed to so I wind up screwing everything up.
I almost did that this weekend. I gave a different guy my phone number right in front of my new guy. Don't ask me why, I guess it just makes me feel good to know that there are still other guys out there who want me and find me attractive. That makes me question whether or not I am truly ready to settle down. I am beginning to see that this whole going clubbing every weekend thing isn't working for me anymore. I never have as much fun as I used to no matter how much I drink or who I am with. I would much rather go to a nice restaraunt and have a noce dinner and go home and relax. That has to count for something, right?
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Monday, February 18, 2008
Picked the worng one...AGAIN
Looks like I picked the worng guy again. Why do I always do this? Maybe my friends are right, I like to be treated like crap, which is why I pick all the crappy guys.
I thought for sure I had the right one. He was everything I have been looking for. Good looking, great job, nice salary, adventurous, likes good food and wine, and he wore glasses (the icing on the cake). He is older and I figured more mature; the two usually go hand in hand. Turns out, that is not necessarily true. I have not heard from him in five days after he went out with someone else on Valentine's Day! If you don't like me, fine, but don't ignore me! Grow up. I am sick of dating boys, I want to date a man.
I can only hope that the other guy will still give me a chance. But, do I want that second chance? What does it mean if I can't stop thinking about him, but I am still unsure of whether or not I want a serious relationship with him? He is so great to me and I can see myself marrying hin and having a family and really being happy, but I can't see myself sleeping with him. That is a big part of a relationship for me. If it's not good in the bedroom, it can't be good anywhere else. I know that he is good for me, and I know that my family would love him. Why does it have to be this hard?
I thought for sure I had the right one. He was everything I have been looking for. Good looking, great job, nice salary, adventurous, likes good food and wine, and he wore glasses (the icing on the cake). He is older and I figured more mature; the two usually go hand in hand. Turns out, that is not necessarily true. I have not heard from him in five days after he went out with someone else on Valentine's Day! If you don't like me, fine, but don't ignore me! Grow up. I am sick of dating boys, I want to date a man.
I can only hope that the other guy will still give me a chance. But, do I want that second chance? What does it mean if I can't stop thinking about him, but I am still unsure of whether or not I want a serious relationship with him? He is so great to me and I can see myself marrying hin and having a family and really being happy, but I can't see myself sleeping with him. That is a big part of a relationship for me. If it's not good in the bedroom, it can't be good anywhere else. I know that he is good for me, and I know that my family would love him. Why does it have to be this hard?
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Friday, February 8, 2008
Lesson Learned
I definitely learned a lesson this time!
There is no way that I can date two guys at one time. It is too stressful and too hurtful to each party involved.
I recently had to break it off with one of the guys I was dating; go figure it was the one who really liked me. He is one of those guys that would run into a burning building to save me knowing that he was not going to make it out. He is going to make a great husband and father for someone one day, but not for me. There was soemthing missing and I didn't want to drag him along until it showed up or until I forced it, it would be false. I have never felt as bad as I did the day I told him we should stop dating. I almost started crying and I wasn't even the one who was being broken up with!
The guy who I am still seeing was hurt, also. He said he felt like I was being "shady" by not telling him things that were going on with the other guy. True, I let out details in my plan, but it was none of his business what I did or who it was with. I told him that I was dating someone else, and when he asked, I was truthful about who I was with. I really like him and I think I really screwed it up. We decided to keep seeing each other and take it from there.
Moral of the story: Don't date two people at once; it's a losing battle.
There is no way that I can date two guys at one time. It is too stressful and too hurtful to each party involved.
I recently had to break it off with one of the guys I was dating; go figure it was the one who really liked me. He is one of those guys that would run into a burning building to save me knowing that he was not going to make it out. He is going to make a great husband and father for someone one day, but not for me. There was soemthing missing and I didn't want to drag him along until it showed up or until I forced it, it would be false. I have never felt as bad as I did the day I told him we should stop dating. I almost started crying and I wasn't even the one who was being broken up with!
The guy who I am still seeing was hurt, also. He said he felt like I was being "shady" by not telling him things that were going on with the other guy. True, I let out details in my plan, but it was none of his business what I did or who it was with. I told him that I was dating someone else, and when he asked, I was truthful about who I was with. I really like him and I think I really screwed it up. We decided to keep seeing each other and take it from there.
Moral of the story: Don't date two people at once; it's a losing battle.
Monday, February 4, 2008
2 for 1
I am doing something right now that I said I would never do: dating two guys at one time. I always knew of girls who dated more than one person at a time and I never knew how they did it. I always told myself that I would never do that because someone would wind up getting hurt and I just didn't think I had it in me to do it. I got into this situation somewhat by accident. I didn't mean to put myself in this situation.
One relationship branched from friendship and turned into him and me hanging out quite a bit each week, which includes us going to dinner and even taking our dogs to the park together. The other came from us meeting through mutual friends.
This is so stressful and I still don't understand how some people can do it. I am so confused by my feelings and the guys' feelings. I am scared because I don't want to get hurt, but I don't want to hurt anyone in the process, although I am fully aware that this is impossible. My brain is going crazy with trying to decide which one I want to be with. One day a I really like one and then the next I really like the other. Both of them have such great qualities, but they are both so different. I wish there was some wayto mold them into one and that would be the perfect man for me.
I know that I need to make a decision some time soon because if I don't I am going to end up with neither.
One relationship branched from friendship and turned into him and me hanging out quite a bit each week, which includes us going to dinner and even taking our dogs to the park together. The other came from us meeting through mutual friends.
This is so stressful and I still don't understand how some people can do it. I am so confused by my feelings and the guys' feelings. I am scared because I don't want to get hurt, but I don't want to hurt anyone in the process, although I am fully aware that this is impossible. My brain is going crazy with trying to decide which one I want to be with. One day a I really like one and then the next I really like the other. Both of them have such great qualities, but they are both so different. I wish there was some wayto mold them into one and that would be the perfect man for me.
I know that I need to make a decision some time soon because if I don't I am going to end up with neither.
Monday, January 14, 2008
Girl + Boy = Friends?
I don't understand why it is so hard for a girl and a guy to just be friends. Why does it have to be someting more? Why do other people have to complicate it and turn it in to something it shouldn't have to be?
I've always had more guy friends than girlfriends because guys tend to be mroe fun with less drama. It always seems to trun into something mor ethan friendship for them, though. Don;t get me wrong, I am absolutely flattered, but if that is what I wanted out of the relationship, I would make it clear. Yes, I know that some of the best and longest lasting relationships start out with the couple being friends, but they wanted to bring on that change. I'm sure that there outside friends did not force them to become something they were not. I thought all of that stopped when you go tout of high school. Guess I was wrong.
It sucks being in that situation with a guy friend because you already hang out all the time together, but now it is awkward because other start to believe that somthing is going on. Then, when you are out in public, no other guy is going to want to hit on you because "Jealous Jim" is right behind you all night. Then, if you do flirt with another guy, you are a bitch because you broke the guy's heart and more than likely your friendship is ruined.
Momma said there'd be days like this, right?
I've always had more guy friends than girlfriends because guys tend to be mroe fun with less drama. It always seems to trun into something mor ethan friendship for them, though. Don;t get me wrong, I am absolutely flattered, but if that is what I wanted out of the relationship, I would make it clear. Yes, I know that some of the best and longest lasting relationships start out with the couple being friends, but they wanted to bring on that change. I'm sure that there outside friends did not force them to become something they were not. I thought all of that stopped when you go tout of high school. Guess I was wrong.
It sucks being in that situation with a guy friend because you already hang out all the time together, but now it is awkward because other start to believe that somthing is going on. Then, when you are out in public, no other guy is going to want to hit on you because "Jealous Jim" is right behind you all night. Then, if you do flirt with another guy, you are a bitch because you broke the guy's heart and more than likely your friendship is ruined.
Momma said there'd be days like this, right?
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Labels
Why is it that the world is so consumed with labels? They are everywhere. Clothing, food, even people.
People are so obessed with having a label on everything including people and I think it is ridiculous. Why do a couple who have been dating a while have to be "boyfriend and girlfriend"? Why can't they just keep dating and having fun? I think that placing a label on a relationship just complicated things. How can you fix something when it is not broken?
I am writing about this because I ahve been dating a guy for a few months now and my friends, one in particular, keeps asking me if he is my boyfriend or if we have graduated to that status yet. I tell her no because we have not even discussed it. I did ask him about it a few weeks ago and he just said we were dating. I know that he is not seeing anyone else, and I also know that I am not either. What does it matter then if we do not refer to each other as girlfriend or bopyfriend?
Ever since I brought up the subject with him, though, I can't stop thinking about why he wouldn't refer to me as his girlfriend. My friend keeps bringing it up, also. Now, I am freaking out and worrying about whether or not he truly likes me and why he is dating me and whether or not we are going to be "dating" for the rest of our lives. I think most of my stress may stem from the fact that i REALLY like this guy and don't want to lose him, which is why I do not bring the subject up with him.
I don't want to place blame on anyone, but if my friend had not asked whether or not we were boyfriend and girlfriend, than I would not be thinking about it. Everything is great in my relationship and I haven't had more fun with a guy doing nothing. Why am I so obessed with labeling, also?
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